The End of the Church as We Knew It

It felt like a bad movie. We stepped quietly through room after deserted room.

Children’s decorations hung from the ceilings. Lonely toys sat motionless in the corners.

Small wooden kids’ chairs lined up in front of the old upright piano. Waiting. Waiting for the children to return to sing those old gospel songs.

As we entered the preschool room, someone said, “They haven’t seen kids in here for 11 years.”

For this church it’s been a slow decline from the glory years. Not only for the children and teenagers. Sunday worship attendance in the grand old sanctuary has dwindled too. Church leaders have gradually walled off the worship space, condensing the room to accommodate the shrinking congregation.

What happened here? How did this church—and thousands more like it—get here? What is the basic root cause for their decline?

I wonder, at some point, did someone here suggest a bold new direction to try? And then did other voices vigorously defend the status quo, in hopes the good old days would return if they just stay the course?

In order to prevent this empty scene from repeating in church after church, we need a clear diagnosis of the root causes.

As we ended the tour I gazed at the classic stained glass windows and wondered. If this were actually a movie set, how would I title the movie? “Night at the Museum of the American Church”? Or “Trip to the Future of the American Church”?

What do you think? What do you think God thinks?

Family Ministry: A Letter from a Parent

(A letter found on a desk at church)

I appreciate what you’re trying to do with “family ministry” at church. And I know you’re disappointed in me and the other parents.

I know I should do more to teach our kids in the ways of the Lord. You’ve given us a lot of stuff to do at home. I know you’ve told us it’s our job to raise our kids “in the Word.” I know you want us to do church at home.

But, I must admit, that never happens. We just don’t have the time or the expertise. I don’t have the Bible knowledge or the theological correctness that you emphasize at church. And since I don’t, it’s just easier to avoid it altogether. I don’t want to make an error.

Through your sermons and Bible studies and classes, it’s obvious you love to teach. And that’s what church is all about, I guess. But I’m not sure you understand what I want for my kids. I really don’t care if they turn into little theologians. I just want them to know that Jesus is real, that he loves them, that they can trust him, and that he wants to be their friend.

I’ve noticed that my kids have picked up those things at home in unplanned, spontaneous ways. Last week I heard our oldest boy talking with a friend. He’s been worried about his sick grandma. And he told his friend how he overheard his mom and dad (us!) talking about how Grandma is in God’s hands.

That’s how it works in our family. I just wish we could get a little better at letting our faith naturally leak out at home.

I was wondering if you could help us with that at church. I know you’re used to doing all the talking. And you’re very good at it. I could never talk like you do. But would you ever consider giving up some of your talk time to let us talk—to let us actually practice talking about our faith? Maybe we could even do that when our kids could join in, or at least overhear us.

It’s just a thought. I know you’re busy working on next week’s lesson.

A Concerned Parent

How to Get Published

I’m often asked: “How do I get published?”

Maybe you have a literary gem or fabulous idea that would benefit the world.

After publishing thousands of books and articles by a wide variety of writers over the years at Group Publishing, I have a few hints for how to get started.

1. Have something fresh and unique to say. Nobody wants to read the musings of someone who “can write on anything.”

2. Condense your thoughts to a central idea. Write a short description of your concept. Just a couple of paragraphs will do.

3. Research publishers that publish work similar to your concept. Here at Group Publishing we publish practical ministry resources. But I’m always astonished at the proposals we receive, such as “Pretty Poems for Sassy Sissies.” Not really a fit for us.

4. Refer to the publisher’s writer guidelines. Many publishers provide detailed instructions for what and how to submit writing to them. Most publishers place their guidelines on their websites. Find Group’s guidelines here.

5. Send your proposal to one or more publishers that fit you. Keep it to a page. Include a bit about yourself, your experience, and why you’re the one to write this masterpiece.

6. Wait for a request for more details. If publishers are interested they’ll likely ask for more information, perhaps a table of contents and a sample chapter.

7. Get to work. If your proposal is accepted, the publisher will offer a contract that defines writing specifications, deadlines, and compensation details. You sign, then go to work writing.

The publisher then takes your work, edits it, markets it, distributes it, and compensates you. Of course, you also have the option of self-publishing, which will require more time, expertise and financial investment on your part.

What are your questions about getting published?

The Leadership Gene: Do You Have It?

You either have it, or you don’t.

Are true leaders born or made? When it comes to effectively leading, motivating and administrating staff, truly great leaders “come from the factory” as natural leaders.

Many disagree with this conclusion. Numerous leadership “gurus,” writers, speakers, teachers and trainers contend that leadership is a skill that anyone can master. I find their position curious.

• These leadership “experts” have a vested interest. They’re selling leadership training, consulting, books, videos and speaking gigs. The marketability of their wares increases if they espouse that everybody can become a leader.

• I know a number of these leadership experts. Some say they’ve read every leadership book. Some write on the subject of leadership. However, many of these experts have had very little actual experience leading people in day-to-day endeavors. And some have a dreadful record of actually leading staff in real organizations.

So, how did I arrive at the “leadership gene” theory? I’ve read the books and listened to the experts. But my most reliable findings have come from 35 years of experience and observation in the real world of church, business, and non-profit organizations. Here’s what I’ve found:

• Leadership training and skill-building can help a born leader rise in excellence. But training and personal ambition cannot transform an unnatural leader into an excellent leader of people.

• God instills within his people different gifts, including the gift of leadership. See Romans 12:8: “If God has given you leadership ability, take the responsibility seriously.” God doesn’t give the leadership gift to everyone. Just to some.

What shall we do with this approach to leadership? All organizations, especially churches, need great leaders.

Ask yourself: Are you a natural leader? Usually, other people spot and eagerly follow born leaders—at a young age. Did others recruit you to be their leader on the playground, in the neighborhood, in scouts, in school, and other childhood activities? If so, you may be a born leader.

If you are a born leader, sharpen your skills, step up and “take the responsibility seriously.”

If you’re not a born leader, rejoice in your own given gifts. And help find—and support—others who are born leaders.

Get out of the way of God’s truly gifted leaders. Let them lead.

Leading staff is not the only way to lead. You may be a thought leader, which you may pursue through conversation, writing, speaking, teaching and role-modeling. You may positively persuade without leading a staff.

But don’t assume that thought leaders automatically qualify as leaders of people. This myth leads to dysfunctional, poorly led churches. It happens all too often.

Have you seen it too?

What Kills Your Ministry Heroes

It was a sad scene. The followers and donors slumped in their chairs as they heard allegation after allegation about their former hero.

Last week I watched from the back of the room as damning stories unfolded about humanitarian Greg Mortenson, author of the best-selling “Three Cups of Tea.” His friends and former friends reacted with dismay, sadness, anger and some denial.

Earlier this year, a “60 Minutes” investigation charged Mortenson with lies and financial improprieties. His not-for-profit organization, Central Asia Institute, built schools in Afghanistan. However, investigators said Mortenson’s ascent to fame included false stories, accounts of non-existent schools, mis-use of donated funds, lavish spending on travel luxuries, and improper promotion of his books.

One of the critical speakers last week said that some of Mortenson’s fallen values may trace back to his upbringing as the son of Christian missionaries. But I don’t think he was ruined by his faith. I think he was ruined by his fame.

His exaggerated stories catapulted his book to best-seller status, and his high-profile speaking gigs fueled a place in the spotlight that eventually shone harshly on him.

That’s the thing with fame. It tends to eat people alive. Even in our lesser-known world of Christian ministry, fame kills. It rots the humility and poisons the self-concept of those in the public eye. Christian speakers, authors, musicians and leaders in local churches are not immune to the dangers of the toxic spotlight.

No one who seeks ministry fame escapes undamaged. Like Mortenson, the work usually begins with good intentions. But something ugly happens when the fans begin to adore their stars. Pride takes over. And that creeping pride turns good intentions into an insatiable lust for seeing one’s name in lights. And that turns the Lord’s servants into self-absorbed inflated egos.

The phenomenon is not new. Gospel accounts tell of the disciples arguing over who was the greatest among them. Jesus warned, “Anyone who wants to be first must be the very last, and the servant of all.”

May we all take a cue from Jesus, and guard against the seduction of fame:

1. Don’t confuse servanthood with the spotlight.
2. Ask, “Would I still passionately pursue this ministry (position, book, gig, etc.) if my role were completely anonymous?”
3. Don’t lead others into temptation. Don’t fawn over Christian “stars.”

The Mortenson meeting ended with a man admitting, “I feel so betrayed. Last year I remember sitting spellbound at Greg’s talk. He was such a hero for me. What happened?”

Fame corrupts. Even among those with the best of intentions.

A Truly Relevant Ministry

Many church leaders pursue relevance with a passion. But are they providing a truly relevant ministry?

Relevance—connecting God to people’s everyday lives—is a good thing. But some things done in the name of relevance can make us look, well, like wannabe cool Christians.

Many churches try to capture relevance through cosmetics—surface applications that attempt to polish a public image. Examples:

• Trendy-sounding church names, such as Liquid, Paradox, Flipside, and, of course, Relevant.
• Hipster graphics.
• Flashy technology.
• Dirty jeans, soul patches, and funky eyewear.

These things aren’t wrong. It’s fine to keep up with the fashions of the day. But they don’t deliver relevance.

Fads and fashions are mass-produced. Relevance, however, cannot be mass-produced. Relevance is extremely individual. What’s relevant for me is not relevant for the person sitting next to me in church.

If we want to be relevant we must find ways to make a message personalized, individualized, and customized to each person. That’s true relevance.

We work at this individualized relevance every week at our Lifetree Café gatherings. We do that in a variety of ways, including creative participatory experiences, individualized prayer times, and guided conversation. We pose compelling questions for people to relate to their individual lives. At tables of four, each person gets to talk about his or her own unique joys, pains and challenges.

Today we talked about how God gets our attention. One woman talked about a situation with her son. A man next to her talked about everyday evidences of God’s hand in nature. Another described the wonder of childbirth. Each ah-ha was relevant.

No two people had the same relevant experience—or the same discovery of God’s customized interaction in their lives.

If we desire a relevant ministry, sometimes we need to get out of the way and make room for God to minister—one on one.

Lectures and Sermons Get Failing Grade

The lecture method of teaching (e.g., preaching) delivers disappointing results.

The problem isn’t with the competency of the speaker. Even the best lecturers falter when compared with other approaches to teaching and learning.

Research continues to show the weakness of the lecture approach. The latest appeared this month in the journal Science. A Nobel prize-winning physicist compared two nearly identical classes of Canadian college students. One class featured a highly rated veteran professor using time-tested lecturing. The other class was led by inexperienced graduate students using interactive methods.

The students in the interactive class scored almost twice as well as those in the lecture class.

The interactive class involved very little lecture. Instead the instructors used small-group discussion, interactive student clicker devices, demonstrations and question-answer sessions.

“This is clearly more effective learning,” said Carl Wieman, the lead researcher. “Everybody should be doing this. You’re practicing bad teaching if you are not doing this.”

The results of this latest study don’t reveal a new phenomenon. In fact, Wieman said, “Lectures have been equally ineffective for centuries.”

That was true even in Jesus’ time on earth. His ministry was effective not because he stood behind a wooden box and lectured for an hour. Yes, he delivered short stories and ideas. But he supercharged his teaching with interactive elements that involved his participants in memorable and life-changing ways.

So, with all the mounting evidence, why do academia and the church cling so stubbornly to the lecture method?

4 Tips for Powerful Speaking

Want to be a high-impact speaker? After training hundreds of presenters, I’ve found several tips that can take your speaking to the next level.

My last post focused on the importance of telling your own remarkable story. Now, here’s how to make your presentation to any audience really shine.

1. Make 1 point. Reduce your message to one sentence. Then deliver on that. Forget everything they told you about three-point sermons. Those of us in the audience aren’t going to digest all that stuff. You are extremely successful if you send us home with one well-presented, memorable point. It might be something like “the hardest to love are those who need our love the most.”

2. Make them laugh, make them cry. Engage a range of emotions in your audience. Delivering data and documentation are good, but ultimately your audience will be moved through their emotions. That’s why Jesus provoked emotion. He sparked wonder with his miracles, fear with the storm on the lake, conviction with the woman caught in adultery, and delight with a coin found in the mouth of a fish.

3. Involve your audience. Let them actually experience the message. If you’re speaking on Jonah, fill the room with the odor of a stinking fish. If you’re speaking on guilt, ask your people to walk across the room with a pebble in their shoe. Then engage them in debriefing the experience, drawing parallels to real life.

4. Understand and honor how people learn. Most speakers and preachers seem to assume their people are all auditory learners. Only a minority of an audience processes communication primarily through their ears. Most are visual learners. So, create presentations that connect through all learning modalities. And mix it up every few minutes. Attention spans, even among adults, last only a few minutes with one mode of communication.

Effective public speaking, the kind that changes lives, is part art, part science.

You can learn more–and experience how to become a truly effective communicator–at a fun, concentrated course offered at Group Publishing’s headquarters in August. Check it out here: http://group.com/regroup

Move People with Your Remarkable Story

So, you want to be a speaker who moves people? who changes people? who makes a difference?

I appreciate speakers who move me. And I’ve noticed they exemplify certain characteristics that make them inspiring, memorable, and life-changing.

They’re not merely entertaining, as I explained in my last post. They’re significant.

What makes them so? First, they have a personal, remarkable story to tell. I think of Ron who spends his free time helping families stricken with suicide—because his son took his own life. And Mandy who pursues a singing career, even though she lost her hearing. And Justin who organizes skid row makeovers for homeless moms on Mother’s Day.

Personal stories move me. They’re authentic, meaningful and meaty.

If you wish to move people, deliver personal, remarkable stories. Now, I must qualify, when I say personal, remarkable stories I don’t mean your typical sermon illustrations. You know what I mean: “Last week I saw the neighbor boy pick up a kitten by the tail. Isn’t that just like how God gets our attention?” Save me.

Stories that move people are significant, real and personal. But when you’re expected to speak often, how do you do that? You may have one or two of those great stories from your past. But you probably don’t have 52 remarkable, personal stories per year.

Let me offer a couple of suggestions.

Most preachers spend 20 hours or more per week preparing their sermons. They’re typically holed up in a book-festooned office poring over commentaries, the internet, and other people’s writings. They emerge from solitary confinement at the end of the week with a 30-minute script of thoughts, concepts, Bible readings, kitten illustrations, and stories gleaned from others.

How about this? Suggestion #1. Take half of that prep time and engage in something that can produce your own significant story. If you’re preparing to speak on Matthew 25, go spend a day visiting prisoners. Then on Sunday tell us your jailhouse story. If you’re preparing a talk on God’s free gift of grace, go downtown and try some reverse panhandling. Hand out free dollars and note people’s reactions. Then come and tell us your story. Do something significant, then tell.

Suggestion #2. Though you may run out of personal, remarkable stories, you have a bountiful supply all around you. Let the people whom God has placed around you share their stories on your stage. Lend them the microphone. Live or on video. Recently my pastor handed over his sermon time to the videotaped spiritual journey of a man in our church. It was indelible.

Want to make a difference? Do you want to truly help people grow closer to the Lord? Incorporate powerful, personal, remarkable stories.

In my next post, I’ll offer additional suggestions on how to deliver your message in a way that sticks.

To Be a Great Communicator

That term, “great communicator,” seems to be in vogue among ministry people. They no longer talk about great preachers or speakers. Today they’re looking for great communicators.

These great communicators rise to ministry rock-star status. They attract a sizable fan base. They become a brand.

I’ve heard our teams at Group refer to great communicators when planning upcoming national conferences, such as LifeServe, KidMin, and the Simply Youth Ministry Conference.

Many churches attribute their success to their high-profile preachers, who they refer to as great communicators.

But what do they mean when they say “great communicator”? What separates a great communicator from all the also-rans? When they hear one, what do they instinctively notice that elevates that one to a great communicator? What is the primary litmus test?

Sometimes they’ll say so-and-so “has great things to say, but he’s a lousy communicator.” So that tells me the true test is not content.

Other times they’ll say so-and-so “really knows her theology, but she’s a mediocre communicator.” So, biblical acumen can’t be the deciding factor.

So, what really makes a “great communicator”?

I’ve come to realize it’s the speaker’s ability to hold people’s attention. In other words, the “great communicator” is a great entertainer, one who helps the time pass quickly.

The evidence appears in the audience’s adoration. “I love to listen to him.” “She’s so funny.” “I could listen to him for hours.”

I heard a co-worker say, “Let’s get (so-and-so.) I heard him at a conference last year. He was great!”

We asked, “What did he say? What did he do for you?”

She paused, scratched her head, and finally said, “Well, I don’t remember his point. I just remember leaving his talk thinking he was really great.”

He was an entertainer.

Entertainment is often a good thing. I like to be entertained. I’m just uncomfortable with the current use of this term—“great communicator.” It implies communication, which I regard as a two-way interchange between the sender and the receiver. And in ministry, what happens in the receiver should be far more important than what happens with the sender on stage.

Truly great communicators ignite life change. In ministry work, this results in someone noticeably growing and following closer to Jesus.

When this happens, people may not even remember the great communicator. They remember—and see—God, and his life-changing impact on their lives.

Truly great communicators realize the great truth: it’s not about them.

So, are you interested in being a truly great communicator? I’ll share some tips in the next blogpost.